Tag Archives: happiness

5 REASONS TO ALWAYS BELIEVE THAT EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON

RyanHeshka_web03

“I trust that everything happens for a reason, even if we are not wise enough to see it. When there is no struggle, there is no strength.” Oprah Winfrey

The well-known Greek Philosopher Aristotle, believed that everything happens for a reason, always. And that every experience in your life, was designed to shape you and reform you into the ultimate and greatest version, that could ever imagine yourself to be. The only thing that prevents this, is having the wisdom to see it.

1. In Times of Struggle

Every negative experience; every time of struggle, can then be viewed as an opportunity for tremendous growth. Alike to a caterpillar burrowing from its chrysalis. When all of its forming and changing is complete, its metamorphism has transformed it into a magnificent butterfly. It has shed its former skin, and flown on the wings of new life and a new way of being.

2. In Times of Healing

Some may find it hard to believe that everything happens for a reason, especially when experiencing grief or loss. At the time it may be very difficult to see the blessing in it, as all that is being felt is pain. But it is through our lowest points in life, where we gain the wisdom and allow for new-found strength to emerge. Without loss we wouldn’t appreciate  gain, without grief we wouldn’t appreciate love. Without death, we wouldn’t appreciate life and without fear, we wouldn’t appreciate love.

3. In Times of Happiness

By far, the most victorious of all happen stances, when it all comes together in one moment, the AHA moment, as the metaphorical photo finally develops. When we reach the point, after all of the struggles, the self-substantiating realization beams through and we finally see the wisdom behind the subconscious choices we’ve made. Clarity shines through like the morning sun peeking out on the earths horizon.

4. In Times of Chaos

True chaos, cannot be chaos for as long as there is choice involved. Things may appear to be random, but as we all know appearances lie.

 “To someone who can’t read, letters on a page appear to be randomly chose when in reality they are precisely ordered.”- Deepak Chopra

Meaningful coincidences and synchronicities may also be viewed as random events with no connection, yet to the eye of the beholder, those events would have a real purpose and meaning.

5. In Times of Reflection

We see the pieces of the puzzle begin to come together, each unfolding a beautiful picture. The pain, the turmoil, the struggles and the victories, each essential building blocks to the molding of who we are today in this present moment.

An unfinished product, always growing, learning and experiencing. And by reflection we see, why it had to happen the way it did.

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life”- Steve Jobs

http://thespiritscience.net/2015/10/17/5-reasons-to-always-believe-that-everything-happens-for-a-reason/

FOR THE WOMEN WHO WOULD NEVER CALL THEMSELVES -Wild Woman -Warrior or “Goddess

spiritualism-2-egyptian-goddess-bast-original-lithograph-print_-by-seshetta-diveena-seshetta-art-and-prints

Wildness lurks in all of us, though we don’t all choose to flaunt it so obviously.

We do not need to appear passionate, intense or ferocious to be interesting—like an iceberg sitting in calm waters, our passions, intensity and ferocity can be hidden out of view, shared only with our inner circle. Even the deer that moves gracefully through the woods is as captivating, it its own way, as the fierce lioness.

They are equally wild, but express themselves differently.

I watch my cat, who is technically a “tame” creature, not entitled to the classification of “wild” because she lives interdependently among humans. Oh, but I know that, for all her tameness, the wildness is there in equal measure—it’s just that she rarely feels the need to unleash it (thank God!).

And despite my own calm demeanor, which causes some people to underestimate my strength, I too may unleash my ferocity—suddenly and without warning—should I perceive that someone has crossed an unacceptable boundary, or simply triggered a fear.

And I know that I am not alone. Some of us may move more quietly through the world, but we need to know (and trust) that we are capable of being fierce and wild, should the need arise.

We are not all drawn to the esoteric or the mystic.

But within us all lies a God(dess) force—for we are all connected to divine source, containing both masculine and feminine energy. It is not a special power granted to a special bunch of people.

It is a universal power, or energy, available to us all.

Some of us are more consciously attuned to that inner force than others. And some of us simply do not want to tune into it. Perhaps we were persecuted for the overt expression of our godliness in a previous life. Or maybe we are young souls who are not yet ready to delve into our power. But it is there—whether we recognize it, or identify with the label. It is there for us, if we do want it.

We are all Goddess.

And we are warriors too, for we have survived this long and this far.

We are still here—that is no mean feat. We have done battle with our demons—both inner and outer—and lived to tell the tale (or keep it quiet).

Some of us wear our warrior badges with pride and others keep them hidden in a drawer. But we don’t have to wear them loudly to carry their essence about us. We are strong. Stronger than we sometimes acknowledge or believe. But we are. If we weren’t, we would not still be here.

So, no matter how you choose to express yourself in this world, know that you are strong and powerful. And, when needs be, you can be a fearsome force to be reckoned with.

Each of us is extraordinary in our own way. We are neither the labels we identify with, nor those we reject. But we do carry within us the qualities that all labels—“good” and “bad,” the ones we like and those we dislike—seek to encapsulate.

But beyond the labels and their associated qualities, we are essence of the Divine, expressing ourselves in differing ways.

“Wild Woman,” “Warrior” and “Goddess” are primeval, achetyepal energies that we all have the capacity to tap into when we feel the need. So, although we may not choose to express them as aspects of our personality, at our core, we are all Wild Women, Warriors and Goddesses.

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2015/10/for-the-women-who-would-never-call-themselves-wild-woman-warrior-or-goddess/

5 WAYS TO HAVE A RIDICULOUSLY AMAZING LIFE- Richelle Morgan

images

I used to dream, wish and hope for an amazing life—not just an okay life, but a ridiculously amazing life.

When I was younger, that dream had me rolling in style, of course, with fabulous clothes, a big house and a fast car.

As I grew older and wiser, the material wants and needs of my dreams changed—I simply wanted to be inspired and excited to get out of bed.

But that wasn’t happening…I was living within a shell of myself.

Sleep, wake, crawl out of bed, work, eat, sleep and repeat. And repeat. And repeat again. Snooze alert.

I found myself caught in a vortex of boredom with my dreams of a different life on hold. I was stuck. Not unhappy, just stuck, like a pot of overcooked pasta, heavy, uninspired and pasty.

That heaviness was not only settling on my ass, it was finding its way into my heart. And, all I wanted to do was sleep. And eat. And then sleep some more.

The problem was that this wasn’t the first time I experienced this; it was not a new story I was creating where I could put the blame on all the supporting characters. This was my own fault; I had built a decently successful business, had wonderful clients, friends, family and all that fun stuff. I was living in suburbia heaven with a nice car, good home and it was killing me.

Slowly and surely, I was dying inside.

I had worked myself into exhaustion and the stress I put on myself to succeed gifted me with a lovely autoimmune disorder—which was ironic, considering my business was teaching others how to create healthy lifestyles.

I was unmotivated, uninspired and unfulfilled; a walking, talking empty shell. Like a pretty puppet, I moved, acted, responded, but if you had taken the time to knock on my shell, you would have heard a resounding echoing emptiness inside.

So what did I do?

I woke up, took a hard look at my life and told myself to snap out of it. I made the decision to step back into my life, to take the bull by the horns and take charge of myself. No more excuses. No more blame.

It was time to start living from the heart…and it was then that my life started to become a bit more amazing.

It was then that I started to become a bit more amazing.

And, yes, it was that simple. The decision, that is.

I realized that the only way out of my spiraling vortex of un-fulfillment was through me. In order to create the life I dreamed of, I had to be the one to change. I couldn’t blame anyone for my choices, my dissatisfaction or my growing ass. I had to turn the mirror around and face myself.

And at first I peeked, not wanting to face myself. But, as time went on and I did the work needed, that mirror started to shine and reflect a happier me. And now, I can proudly say that I have fully and completely stepped into my life. And I try to do at least one thing to make my life ridiculously amazing each and every day.

Five ways to step into your life and make it ridiculously amazing:

1. Move.

As in, move, breathe and sweat.

You can’t be ridiculously amazing burrowing a hole into your couch or glued to your computer screen. (I know this because I tried. Massive fail! And what makes matters worse, that decently successful business I ran was a fitness business. How sad is that? I was inspiring others to move but couldn’t get myself on board!)

You have to get up and get your ass moving! Get the blood flowing, muscles fired up and the energy levels inspired. And the million excuses you have will come up, shelf them. If you can walk to the fridge, you can move.

I’m not asking you to hop off the couch and run a marathon, go for a walk, dance, do yoga, something. Just move. While you’re at it, move on to number two.

2. Check in and take notice.

One thing that is consistent is that life is continuously changing—and it will pass you by in the blink of an eye if you don’t take notice of it.

Start by checking in and paying attention to the little things that happen on a daily basis. I take the same route everyday to teach and each time I notice something different; it didn’t used to be that way. I used to drive mindlessly to client’s homes or to appointments and find myself 10 km down the highway with no recollection of what just passed me by. I had created a cozy vacuum of numbness that had me periodically checking out of life.

Now, I pay attention. I check in and stay present. Even when I’m doing something I do everyday, it’s become a mini adventure. I’ve noticed that anything can and will happen, but it’s up to me to take notice. So open your eyes, ears and mind. Rediscover your senses.

When you pause and actually notice the little things, what you see might surprise you.

3. Love.

Sweet, juicy, love.

Get the love juice flowing for your friends, family, partner and pets. Basically, anyone or thing that shares your space. Try to sweeten the pot with some unconditional love. Pets, easy. People; maybe not so much so try to practice first and foremost on yourself. Drown yourself in a giant pot of love juice. Be kind and nourishing to yourself in deliciously healthy ways because when we start to treat ourselves as though we are worthy, we set amazing things in motion.

After all, we can’t tap into love if we don’t love ourselves first.

4. Play.

Remember that four letter word?

If you don’t, seek out a niece, nephew, your child or a friend’s child. Watch, listen and learn. Life has enough serious moments without us purposely adding to the mix.

It’s okay to let loose and let your inner child come out and play once in a while. Be silly, dance, sing and laugh a lot. Don’t let anyone dampen your silliness. I did that and it wasn’t fun.

Now I play, a lot, everyday, with my crazy dogs, in the beautiful sea, on my yoga mat and with my boyfriend. They nourish my quirky side and allow me to be me. Which makes me smile a lot.

As a bonus, they’re helping me develop gorgeous laugh lines… much prettier than the frown lines I was working on before.

5. Leap outside your comfort zone.

Don’t think. Get like Nike and just do it! Leap, jump or dive into something that takes you outside your comfort zone, something that scares you a little or a lot.

I did this when I first arrived in Tulum. Shy, deathly afraid of house parties, I became a bit of a hermit back home. Once my shell started to crack open, I forced myself to do things that took me way outside my comfort zone.

The end result was I became more social, less afraid to attend parties or events solo. And it was so extraordinarily freeing, terrifying at times, but once the sweat stopped pouring, I noticed that I was not alone. And no matter what the outcome, I embraced every experience as an opportunity to spread my wings and grow.

Amazing things happen when we open the door to life and let our senses explore. When you step outside your comfort zone and try new things, visit new places, create new adventures, you give back to yourself ten fold. Embrace what comes up when you take a chance on life.

The good with the bad because it will help you grow as a friend, lover, mother or father.

71586.original-4328

Take charge of your life.

If you’re unsatisfied, do something—your life won’t change unless you create the change.

So get things moving, go dance in the rain, kiss your partner deeply, try a new taste, take the road less travelled, open your eyes and drink in the sights.

There’s beauty to be found in simplicity.

Make the choice to step up to the bat and hit a ridiculously amazing home run in this fabulously messy thing we call life.

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/05/5-ways-to-have-a-ridiculously-amazing-life-richelle-morgan/

Find Happiness By Giving Up These 15 Things

SM2

Here is a list of 15 things which, if you give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore. Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:

1. Give up your need to always be right

There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question:

“Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?”
Wayne Dyer 

What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big

2. Give up your need for control

Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.”
Lao Tzu

3. Give up on blame

Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk

Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.

“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.”
Eckhart Tolle

5. Give up your limiting beliefs

about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind.”
Elly Roselle

6. Give up complaining

Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.

7. Give up the luxury of criticism

Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. Give up your need to impress others

Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. Give up your resistance to change

Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls.”
Joseph Campbell

10. Give up labels

Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open.

“The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.”
Wayne Dyer

11. Give up on your fears

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.

“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.”
Franklin D. Roosevelt

12. Give up your excuses

Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. Give up the past

I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

14. Give up attachment

This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another, attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.

15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations

Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves. You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

A Walk In The Dark!

colette-saint-yves-via-mysticmamma

tumblr_n0jxsngsMM1rqgdo4o5_500

darkness-stars

screen-shot-2014-02-28-at-10-30-41-am

11334581_783739311742707_1886776822_n

tumblr_mx79qiqpej1srnol7o1_500

M.-C.-Escher-4

tumblr_m7kmfxI6PA1qj73e2o1_500

just-rosemary-courage

tumblr_ntfz4dTMs91uqj0ypo1_500

alone-cry-girl-hurt-Favim.com-1328911

anger-quotes-boys-and-girls-3

1439044552706

jung-quotes
318f56ec87a30913eea17a16eede4de3-198x300

tumblr_mkwhkfgfTU1rbytf6o1_500_large

10236162

081520d06e29e44b69cf27200e76818f

VIRGIL-FINLAY-American--1914-1971.--Jackpot---Galaxy-Science-Fiction-story-illustration--October-1956_900

11807642_1483838628422510_4915343826899296157_o

11820488_412176165638594_1458337164_n

tumblr_mtpvleMI0P1qeh3wio1_250

tumblr_meo49ekSdl1qaoi6bo1_500

daemon

time

Dedicated to my eternal friend: you know who you are xxx

10 Rules I Live By To Face Whatever The World Brings

self-love-is-loving-yourself-truly-and-knowing-you-are-perfect-just-as-you-are-1024x683

1. Stop trying to fix others.

Why is it that we know exactly how to fix other people’s problems? The truth is that when we try to fix others, we rob them of the opportunity to fix themselves. We’re saying to them, I know better than you. In reality most people don’t want to be “fixed,” they want to be heard. Rather than tell your best friend, your partner or your co-worker what to do, let them be their own guru. Listen.

2. Believe in you.

Whom or what you believe in is up to you. The Hebrew word for “to pray” isl’hitpallel. It is in the reflexive voice, which means that when you pray, you pray to yourself. With this small grammatical distinction the Jewish language is telling us an important truth about our lives; faith begins with you. So if you feel you have lost almost all faith, at the very least don’t stop believing in you.

3. Ditch the F-word (fear, of course).

Our human tendency is to believe that all unknowns are dangerous. It’s part of our evolutionary make-up. When faced with a life-changing or life-upending decision or opportunity, we tend to find all kinds of reasons to avoid leaving our comfort zones and crossing new thresholds. But it’s time to ditch the F-word. Courage is feeling the fear and moving forward anyway. Be courageous.

alannah1

4. Accept that you won’t always know why something bad has happened.

We all know that bad things happen to good people. Life moves without our consent. Yet we can spend a lifetime trying to figure out “why.” Rather than stay fixated on that question, as Rabbi Harold Kushner, the author of Why Bad Things Happen to Good People tells us, ask “What now?” When you do, I promise you that the next threshold will be waiting for you.

5. Stop comparing.

Why is it that everyone else’s life looks easier, better and more glamorous than your own? The grass is truly greener if you compare the outsides of others with your insides. Remember if we want to overcome our (very human) instinct to measure our happiness against the happiness we see around us, we must realize that our perception of others’ happiness is often very wrong. Just because a room might be right for your friend, your co-worker, or your neighbor doesn’t mean that room is right for you. If you can celebrate others, you will find your own life worth celebrating.

6. Search for meaning, not happiness.

Happiness is overrated. There is no universal recipe, even though we would like to think there is. As a society, we have a very narrow definition of what happiness is: fame, wealth, power, and prestige. But these things are not universally attainable and quite often fleeting. Instead, create experiences that give you meaning and purpose, and you will find a new kind of “happiness” that will sustain you throughout all of life’s challenges.

Rainy Day Love

7. Let go of perfect. Strive for the best you can do.

We have become a society that believes that everything falls into two buckets: things that are perfect and then everything else. So if our decision to cross a threshold does not lead directly to perfect, our reasoning goes, then why bother? Bother because life is made up of more than two buckets and contrary to what we may believe, no one has a perfect life. Perfection is not a destination, but there is a lot of pretty good along the way.

8. Each day is an act of faith.

Getting out of bed each morning is an act of faith. In Judaism we even say a blessing of gratitude the moment we open our eyes. Having faith does not necessarily mean believing in God (I know, shocking, coming from a rabbi!). it means having faith in you. It means knowing that you have the inner tools and resources to face all the obstacles in your way.

9. Don’t let your emotions determine your reaction.

I’ll be the first to admit that when it comes to emotion, restraint is not always my strong suit. To combat this tendency, I developed the Wait Box: a file on my computer that exists today. Whenever I am tempted to react viscerally to a person or situation, I write my response — holding nothing back — and file it in the Wait Box. There my emotional response sits for twenty-four hours and marinates.

Of course, rarely does the response I initially write ever see the light of day. Usually it gets dumped in the trash and later replaced with something much more thoughtful, logical, and productive. There is always value in waiting and letting the thoughtful response catch up with the emotional one.

Sending-Love

10. Believe that tomorrow will be better.

The adage “tomorrow is a new day” may be cliché, but it rings true for a reason. The nature of life is that we can’t go back. We can only go forward. When we wish to re-create the past, we are really wishing to go back to a place that no longer exists. Find strength in knowing that we are not the same as yesterday, and we can move onward and upward. Today may be extremely challenging, but tomorrow will be different.

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-21341/10-rules-i-live-by-to-face-whatever-the-world-brings.html

What Self-Loving People Do Differently

I 38592d9d3ce750158423778cbd5069d5

I used to look at people who were successful, healthy and happy, wondering, “What’s their secret? Why can’t I do that?”

After a decadelong struggle with eating disorders, addiction, and self-loathing, I realized that the reason I couldn’t be happy like the people I envied was that I didn’t love myself and they did.

For me, shifting from self-loathing to self-love has been profoundly healing and epiphany-inducing. I can hardly believe how simple it’s been for me to quit smoking, eat well, exercise daily, find a loving relationship, and have the career of my dreams. And it’s all thanks to self-love.

Now, I see happy people and I smile, knowing that their lives are products of a series of habits that support their relationships with themselves.

Here are seven things that self-loving people do differently.

1. They listen to their emotions.

Most people spend their lives doing one of two things to their emotions: numbing or venting. Often, they do a combination of the two (i.e. they numb until they can’t hold it in anymore, then they explode).

Self-loving people do something very different — they accept each emotion as a piece of communication and they try to decode it. This way, emotions can become important guideposts on the journey of self-discovery, rather than annoying roadblocks.

2. They choose responsibility over blame.

When something negative happens, self-loving people will look for a way to take responsibility, rather than searching for someone to blame. They know that placing blame doesn’t solve the problem — it only cultivates anxiety and helplessness. By choosing to take responsibility, self-loving people do themselves the favor of encouraging change and acceptance rather than stewing in stagnation and suffering.

3. They feed their passions and talents.

Every person in this world feels the gentle tug of fascination toward some hobby or activity. Sometimes that tug isn’t so gentle! Self-loving people learn to recognize that inner longing as something important, and they devote their time and energy to nourishing those desires. Self-loving people do something every single day that they love doing, and they allow themselves the space to explore new interests that arise. They know that nourishing their own inner hunger is much more important than any fears they might have about what feeding it looks like.

4. They spend time alone.

Those who have unhealthy, abusive relationships with themselves often have an intolerance of being alone. The moment they have some space with themselves, they feel the incoming discomfort of self-defeating thoughts and toxic emotions, so they reach for the phone or the vice. Self-loving people do the opposite. They look forward to their time by themselves, just as you’d look forward to a date with a beloved friend. They not only make time for themselves, they start to miss their time alone if they don’t take it.

5. They sleep on it.

As we learn to respect ourselves, we become more long-term oriented. Instead of caving to momentary impulses and immediate gratification, self-loving people will sleep on it and weigh the outcomes of important decisions. Paradoxically enough, being able to delay gratification and think about long-term outcomes gives us the ability to enjoy our lives more in every single moment, because that “long-term” that we’re always thinking about becomes our entire way of life.

6. They teach people how to treat them and walk away if they cannot.

Those who deny themselves love, respect, and approval will inevitably seek those necessities from other people. When we base our relationships with others on approval-seeking and love-hunger, we’re not really respecting ourselves or other people. We’re just running each other dry.

That’s why self-loving people approach relationships from a place of self-sufficiency. They know what they need to feel respected and they know what they have to offer. They gently teach the people around them about their boundaries and, if those are crossed repeatedly, they have the courage to walk away.

7. They admit their mistakes.

Those who don’t have self-respect are always measuring themselves against some outside standard. In many cases, that standard is being “right.” They feel good when they’re right and crestfallen when they’re wrong, because their whole sense of identity is wrapped up in these labels. Self-loving people tend to identify with more permanent parts of their experience, rather than temporary states like right/wrong, old/young, happy/sad. They feel a deep, unconditional acceptance of themselves, which gives them the power to practice self-improvement without losing self-love. Thus, they not only admit when they’re wrong, they expect to be.

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-16425/what-self-loving-people-do-differently.html

7 Inner Habits of Remarkably Happy People!

tumblr_m62sluL1az1rt28efo1_500

Your life is precious.

You yearn to make the most of it.

Yet on some days, you wake up dreading the day ahead.

You find yourself asking, ‘What’s wrong?  Why do I feel so flat?’

You’re not alone, most of us experience times like these.

What sets happy people apart, is their way of being in the world – even in difficult times.

Remarkably happy people bounce back from whatever life throws their way.

For them, happiness is a habit.

The good news is we can all learn how to make happiness a habit.

Here are seven ways remarkably happy people approach life (and you can too).

1. Tackle tough situations directly

Fall seven times, stand up eight. – Japanese proverb

Perhaps problems with your boss, a financial crisis or health issue are bringing you down. Maybe you feel stuck in the drama, or try to bottle up your feelings?

Happy people take a different approach

Rather than spend time telling themselves, ‘All is well’ –  while sweeping their problems under the rug,  they allow themselves to experience sadness, disappointment and anger at what’s happened.

Their energy continues to flow; their hearts and minds remain open.

Simply being with what is, keeps you honest and open about what’s going on –  as well as receptive to suggestions for handling the situation.

If you remain present and open, you can quickly let go of the part that’s not within your control.  And you can access creative problem-solving abilities to address the part that is within your control.

2. Master the art of having fun

Just play. Have fun. Enjoy the game. – Michael Jordan

Recently, I saw a commercial where a father is watching his young son play baseball.  The son misses every catch.  The game ends.  A look of concern comes over the father’s face.  He approaches his son and asks him how he’s doing.  A huge smile spreads across the boy’s face.  He responds “I was awesome!”

When was the last time you felt like that?

Like children, the most happy amongst us master the art of having fun.

How can you master this art?

Do what brings you joy and connect with that joy, instead of judging yourself on your performance.

Put time and money aside to fund your fun. Do you need a new guitar, or some biking equipment?

Turn a jar into a “fun things account” and put your loose change in it each week.

3. Let go of goals if you outgrow them

 We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us. – Joseph Campbell

Back in your teens, what dreams did you have?

Perhaps you imagined a certain career, finding the love of your life, traveling the world, or making a lot of money?

The more you imagined it, the more you became attached to the outcome.  You set goals, invested time and energy into your dreams of the future.

But our journey through life often doesn’t turn out as we imagine.  And what we thought would make us happy, sometimes doesn’t.

The most happy among us leave themselves open to possibilities.  Instead of seeing life as something to control by rigidly sticking to plans, they see it as an adventure to be experienced.  They have goals, yet allow their life to unfold, tweaking plans or creating new ones when a better option appears.

Let’s take a look at how this could play out in your life.

If a goal no longer matters to you, don’t worry about what might happen if you change course.  You aren’t limited by other people’s opinions about what’srealistic.  Embrace your hunches and look for new options that appeal to you.

Step through your fear into a new future.

4. Protect your priorities

Learn to say ‘no’ to the good so that you can say ‘yes’ to the best. – John C. Maxwell

Ever said yes to something and then found yourself feeling resentful, or burned out from doing it?  In today’s busy world many demands are made on our time and most of us struggle with saying no.

When we try to be all things to all people and taking on too much is one of the ways we limit our happiness.

In contrast, happy people know each moment offers them a chance to spend their time, attention and love on what matters most.  They honor their gifts and value their priorities.  When no is the best answer, they not only say it gracefully, they feel okay doing so.

How can you phrase a graceful ‘no’ to protect your priorities ?

Next time you need to protect your own precious time, you could say something like, ‘I’m really honored you asked me, but I just don’t have the time to take you up on your offer.  Thanks so much for thinking of me, though.’

To be able to say yes to what brings them happiness and fulfilment, you also need to say no to protect your priorities.

5. Dedicate your life to something bigger than yourself

The best moments in our lives are not the passive, receptive, relaxing times. The best moments usually occur if a person’s body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile. – Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

Happy people dedicate their lives to something bigger than themselves, something challenging and meaningful.  They spend years honing their skills, stretching just beyond their comfort zones.

When you become deeply involved in this way, you forget yourselfand experience a heightened awareness of each moment.  Much like what occurs during meditation, you can reach a state of harmony, flow and ease.

These activities give your live meaning and make you happy in a deeper, long-lasting way.

6. Speak out for positive change

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. – Margaret Mead

It’s natural to want to fit in.  We are all influenced by others.

And it can be a good thing.

If you’re trying to lose weight, being around someone committed to the same goal can truly help.  Want to improve your skills at work?  Finding a mentor makes the process a lot easier.

Fitting in this way increases our happiness.

But then, there are those other times.  Someone at work tells an off-color joke, or your new boyfriend’s brother hides a put-down in an amusing story about another person.

Suddenly, fitting in feels awkward.

And while saying nothing and letting the moment pass may feel like the safest route to take, it won’t increase your happiness.  In fact, it will lower it.

Happy folks tend to speak out if they feel uncomfortable about a situation. If you want to be happier,  stay true to who you are and honor your values and beliefs, even if it means not fitting in.

7. Make mistakes

Sucking at something is the first step to being sorta good at something.”–Adventure Time (the cartoon)

Think about the engaging, magnetic people you’ve met in your life.  Maybe they had a talent you really admired, an air of confidence about them, or they did things you could only dream of.

Odds are, they made some huge, slap-your-forehead mistakes along the way.  Yet they weren’t afraid to admit their blunders; they may have even turned them into funny stories.

The most joyous amongst us know that lasting happiness isn’t about playing it safe.  They’re curious and adventurous by nature.

Here’s how you can do it…

Be willing to take risks, explore and grow, even if it means forgoing comfort or momentary happiness.

Even if it means failing.

Because the most awesome things in life reside just outside what’s comfortable and familiar.

Are You Ready to Create Some Happy Habits of Your Own?

What you do today can improve all your tomorrows. – Ralph Marston

The world has too many people who are just going through the motions.  People who do what society tells them to.

What the world needs are more remarkably happy people.  People who light up their corner of the world and lift up others.

Because happiness is an energy that enhances the lives of those around us.

If you want to live a remarkably happy life, one that leaves the world a better place for you having been in it, you can’t just read about remarkably happy people.

Being happy isn’t a philosophy to be analyzed or debated, it’s a way of life.

You have to live it.

That means accepting what’s outside of your control, instead of breaking yourself against it.

It means budgeting your time and money for things that make your life more meaningful.  And saying no to things that don’t –  even when it’s uncomfortable.

It means stepping out of your comfort zone.  Scheduling time to dedicate your talents and strengths to something bigger than yourself.

You have to realize you’re in charge of your happiness.  And, by taking steps to become happier, you will brighten up so much more than just your own life.

These seven habits of remarkably happy people are your steps toward a happier life.

So, take that first step.

The world is waiting.